Ah, Jared's Java. Pleasant taste. Slight Monsterism.

Welcome to the home of my mind, where I brew my intellectual and spiritual joe. Sit back and let me pour you a cup or two. I promise not to cut you off, even after you get the caffeine jitters.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Won't You Come Home, Bill Bailey?

So, I bought stuff from Walmart.com and Amazon.com. I bought the Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy DVDs off of Amazon.com because they were cheaper, and I got free shipping. I got a video game from Walmart.com because, even with shipping costs, it was still cheaper than Amazon.com. I saved over 8 bucks total because I ordered from both, and I got a new milk frother out of the deal. Not bad, eh? At least, you'd think so. I am coming to find that free shipping is too costly. I put my order in on the 16th, and Walmart shipped my item from Pretentiously Named Town You Can't Afford To Live In Where Rich Snobs Drink Bad Tasting But Expensive Wine, CA on the 18th. Amazon.com has yet to even ship my order. I'll probably get my stuff from Walmart on Monday. I am hoping to have my DVDs from Amazon.com before they are outdated technology. I will pay for my shipping next time. Though, I have noticed that this morning Amazon.com changed my my order status from "Not Yet Shipped" to "Shipping Soon." Pretty funny, huh?

How about some late week funnies? Here goes:

The Myth: New York is the largest city (in square miles) in the United States.
The Fact: The largest city isn’t New York (320 square miles) or even Los Angeles (498 square miles). It’s Juneau, Alaska. The city covers 3,108 square miles, making it more than six times larger than Los Angeles. The largest city in the contiguous 48 states is Jacksonville, Florida, which covers 841 square miles—more than twice the size of Los Angeles.

Postboxes in a park in Yorkshire (north of London) were painted red by mistake. What’s wrong with that? Red is the color of the bins reserved for people to dispose of their dog droppings; green is the color for mail. Result: A lot of mail wasn’t delivered until the letter boxes were replaced.

NASA keeps a dust library. Seriously, I couldn't have made that one up. I can see the conversation happening in a Houston suburb now..."So, what does George do for a living?" "Well, he collects dirt."


-It’s against the law to feed margarine instead of real butter to prisoners in Wisconsin.
-In Oxford, Ohio, a woman may not remove her clothing while standing in front of a picture of a man.
-It’s against the law in South Bend, Indiana, to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.
-In Hillsboro, Oregon, it’s illegal to let your horse ride in the backseat of your car.
-In Carmel, California, it’s against the law for a woman to take a bath in a business office.

I used to live in Beaverton, OR, which becomes Hillsboro indistinguishably at 185th Avenue. I wonder what size of a car I would have to get to fit a foal in the backseat?

Did you know that for years the globe on the NBC Nightly News spun in the wrong direction. These are the people who are supposed to competently bring you the world events?

Wit and wisdom, courtesy of Calvin and Hobbes. A twisted perspective on reality:

“I have a hammer! I can put things together! I can knock things apart! I can alter my environment at will and make an incredible din all the while! Ah, it’s great to be male!” - Calvin

“Susie, do you hate being a girl? What’s it like? Is it like being a bug? I imagine bugs and girls have a dim perception that nature played a cruel trick on them, but they lack the intelligence to comprehend the magnitude of it.” - Calvin

Calvin: Do you believe in the devil? You know, a supreme evil being dedicated to the temptation, corruption, and destruction of man?
Hobbes: I’m not sure that man needs the help.

Check your crisper drawer: Apples continue to ripen after being picked. Oranges don't.

Please be praying for me. I have some tough decisions to make. The morning shift is opening up. It would be from 5:30 to 2. I am not a morning person, but I would love to not be getting off at 7:30 anymore. There will likely be some politics involved if I want that early slot. I am not sure what to do. Like I said, I really need prayer.

I think I'm spent for the day. Off to read and journal (and work, too).


Looney Mom said...

Ya those mornings kill me too. But I know that God has really been honoring my faithfulness to rise earlier than I'm used to this whole week. He's growing me up!

Those are some whacked out laws. Were these people drunk when they came up with that? Apparently nothing's really changed.

Kathy Brown said...

Praying for you. I worked for the U.S. Postal Service many years back, and one shift I got, that I was quite excited about at the time, was 5 am - 1 pm. I thought I would have so much extra time in my day. Unfortunately, I lived 45 minutes from my office, so I was rising at 3:30 am or thereabouts. Which meant I was exhausted when I got home, so I would take a long nap and then not be able to sleep. If I had been close to the office it would have been GREAT. But so far away it was a NIGHTMARE. So, my counsel is to consider travel time as well. :)

Delia said...

I'll be praying for you to make the right decision for you and Jen.

Lol, in Kentucky it is against the law to walk down the street with an ice cream cone in your pocket.