Ah, Jared's Java. Pleasant taste. Slight Monsterism.

Welcome to the home of my mind, where I brew my intellectual and spiritual joe. Sit back and let me pour you a cup or two. I promise not to cut you off, even after you get the caffeine jitters.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

So, Doc, what's the prognosis?

Matthew 5:13 "You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has become tasteless, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled under foot by men." NASB

These words struck me to my very heart as I read them today. They are actually even more powerful in The Message:
Let me tell you why you are here. You're here to be salt-seasoning that brings
out the God-flavors of this earth. If you lose your saltiness, how will people
taste godliness? You've lost your usefulness and will end up in the garbage.
Ouch. Honestly, that hurt. I've struggled over the last year with this very issue. I've felt that, in so many ways, I've been losing my saltiness. Circumstance and others can only take so much of the blame. At the bottom of the stack lies me, though. Eventually, I have to man up and take responsibility for what I have or haven't done. At the end of the day, only I am responsible for me.

I need some fire back in my heart. Some passion for that which I am so deeply convicted is True. I have allowed my isolation/ostricization from/by others in the church get me down and discouraged. Prayer has become more chore than privilege in my heart. Reading Scripture has become cumbersome and difficult.

I don't usually double-dip because I don't think people like to read more blog post than one on the same day, in general. However, I feel so saddened by this, and just generally frustrated with the direction of my life and who I am, that I needed to get this out and ask for prayer. I really need it.


Joel said...

Be encouraged, it will pass. I'd love to know more about your church history someday. Offline probably I guess.

Dapoppins said...

If I was your fairy godmother, I would come to your home and Poof turn you into a --somthing. So that this would be all fixed and you could be settled in your soul. However, I'm not, so I wont' try. Takin it to the Dude in Charge, instead.

Delia said...

One more voice going to the Dude in Charge here.

Chelf said...

The fact that you are thinking and searching speaks volumes to me. The Dude in Charge will certainly hear these prayers, and get you back into the shaker.