Ah, Jared's Java. Pleasant taste. Slight Monsterism.

Welcome to the home of my mind, where I brew my intellectual and spiritual joe. Sit back and let me pour you a cup or two. I promise not to cut you off, even after you get the caffeine jitters.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

A Journey in Progress

We see him bustin' up goombas and poppin' coin boxes so often that we forget the dude is a crap chaser for a living. This is a t-shirt, and I must own it.

Things have been busy the last couple of days. I haven't had time to blog, but I'm putting a stop to that right now. This is free therapy, and if I go crazy who will cook dinner?

My sweet Jen has been working hard to get off her anti-depressant medication lately. It is an exciting, yet difficult ordeal. Many hurts from the past that have negatively impacted her life have met with resolution and acceptance, so she feels ready to move forward.

Some people need to be on anti-depressant medication their whole lives, and there is no shame in that. However, some don't, and Jen considers herself in that group. So, we trudge on trying to help each other. This is one of the ways that I have been trying to help her.

It has been a difficult task. She is adjusting to having "strong" emotions back. Things that used to not register with her at all now impact her greatly (and there's a lot of positives to that because she experiences a greater level of joy). She has to learn to regulate her emotions because she no longer has medication doing that for her. I am learning that such a thing is not an easy task, at all.

I continue to support her and pray for her as she continues on in this. She fears being forced to go back on her medication because she won't be able to appropriately relate to people without it. I won't let her give up...not without a really good fight.

All this has caused me to reflect on things about our culture (including most Christians). One is: If it's difficult, we should quit trying and just take this other way there because it is more expedient for the moment. I think too many just give up when faced with a difficult situation in their personal lives. We are a culture that is all about doing the easier thing because it is more convenient right now. I fear others giving up on Jen with this issue and not being willing to tough it out with her as she discovers herself and tries hard to live life off this crutch she despises. Whether or not she will be successful in the end, I am not sure (though I certainly believe she will and know that she has what it takes to be successful in whatever she chooses). But I know that Paul commands us to have no debt but the debt of love we owe one another (and love is that antithesis of judgment). I fear people will not be willing to "pay up" on this debt we are commanded to keep...but we keep trusting the Lord as we journey on in our life and faith together.


Chelf said...

I have a close friend who is looking into her own anti-depressant issues. Hers has a side effect of depression. She thinks that is the biggest joke.

I feel that this society is too eager to give medication when none is necessary, but sometimes meds are needed.

I feel that my friend needs hers, and the side effects scare her. I hope that Jen is right that she does not need hers any longer.

You both are on my list. As long as you work through it together, the best outcome is assured. You have God on your side, how can you fail?

Dapoppins said...

I take aniti-bad-mommy medication, and will take it until my kids are old enough that my issues won't affect them so much. But I know the dull-ness of which you speak. A good day is very good when not on meds, and a bad day very bad. I hope there are no harsh side effects for Jen, and I know you will be there for her when she needs you most.

Anne said...

I will be praying for you both. I've never had to take anything for depression BUT, after I had my son I got a little taste of how depression can feel. I will also pray that those around you will be of great support to you both.

On a side note, Folate, a B vitamin, has been known to help with depression. I can tell a huge difference when I'm not giving my body what it needs. Hope this helps.

Delia said...

If Jen is determined to move forward in life without the medication then with God and you beside her, there's no doubt in my mind that she can. It will be hard, probably harder than realizing she needed them in the first place, but if it is what she believes is right for her and what God wills, then it will happen.

Ya'll are in my prayers.

clumsy ox said...

Hmmm... by all accounts, getting off anti-D is tough. No experience there myself, but I know a few people who've gone through that. We'll certainly be in prayer for y'all.

Looney Mom said...

I've been there - many times. The most important thing I learned is that you must wean slowly off the meds - no cold turkey! I crashed so hard after I was forced to go cold turkey, I never felt so suicidal in all my life. It was very scary.

I will pray for protection of Jen's mind and emotions. The enemy knows when we're vulnerable and he just waits around to devour the next victim -- I feel that every month...

You are blessed to have each other while she journeys through this trial. I KNOW she will get through it. How could she not with a Father who loves her with an abundant love, and a husband who truly cherishes her.

Love you guys.

Shan said...

I'm sorry about poor Jen - that sounds rough. I know others who also despise the meds and themselves for needing them.

But what really made me want to comment was "...if I go crazy, who will cook dinner?"

THANK YOU JARED for encapsulating my daily thoughts so succinctly. I now have nothing left to say.

uberstrickenfrau said...

Being a Christian and takin meds is such a landmine issue. It's a very hard road to walk to find what is the right for you. Some times I wish I was on something to make me comfortable numb so I wouldn't be so shredded inside all the time. This may sound strange but it makes me think of the Borg when 7 of nine came out of the collective and had to experiance emotion and thinking clearly and how hard it was to cope.Yeah, I'm a Star Trek freak.